My Dick Turns Green

Written by Tad. Posted in Kooks

I looked up and saw a new patient listed on the white board. The complaint written by the nurse was “urinating green.”

“I wonder what he has taken to make his urine have a green color,” I wondered to myself.

In the room, I found a 38-year-old man who told me he penis had been turning green for five days and it was getting worse. He complained of burning when he urinated. The rest of the history was unremarkable.

I asked him to show me what he was talking about. After examining him, found nothing wrong and told him it looked normal to me.

“It only happens after I piss,” was his response.

I handed him a urinal and turned by back while he urinated. When he was finished, I turned back around and again inspected him. When I pointed out that it still looked normal, he said, “You gotta see it in the sunlight, Doc.” Since it was about 4:00 in the morning that was not an option so I went back to asking more questions.

As it turned out, about a week prior to his visit, he had unprotected sex with someone he viewed as suspect. Since then, he had been worried he might have caught something from her and had been watching for evidence of infection. This had worked on his brain to the point that he was having symptoms and seeing things that were not real. I reassured him and sent him on the way with a recommendation that he use condoms.

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Comments (1)

  • Becca


    Dang it! I was hoping to know why this guy had a “green thumb.”


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